June 29, 2012

It's a mommy thing...

Sometimes I feel inadequate as a wife/mom. 
I'm not the best "Susie Homemaker" if you will.
My house is almost always neat and picked up by the end of the day, yes.
But spic and span clean? No.
I  like to cook, but I don't have dinner ready every single night, and my (oldest) child eats popcorn for dinner.
My husband does the laundry, and I only put them away.
Dishes pile up in the sink, and I never fill up our ice cube trays... (That's for you Matt :) but I love a clean kitchen and feel like I clean it 24/7.
I don't do DIY projects, house projects, yardwork, etc as much as I'd like.
In fact, my kitchen cabinets that we started painting white a few months ago?
They still aren't finished.
I try to bake, but I sometimes fail.
I can't sew. I don't mow the lawn. I like my tv shows and spending time with friends. I also love laying on the couch.
My girls fight, argue, repeat things I'm not proud of... things like, "Go in timeout! You're driving me crazy! Don't do that!" and always want to watch "just one more Dora"
I lose my patience, I say things I don't mean to my husband, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.

I work 3 days a week, and I'm home with the girls the other two days, but sometimes it's hard. It's hard to find my role in this "stay at home mom vs. working mom" world. Because technically I'm both. So in my mind I feel like I should have a clean house, and dinner made, and laundry done, and kids fed and happy, and playdates made, and swimming pools visited, and storytime attended, and yada yada yada. Oh yes, and also work during the week too. Don't get me wrong. I love my position. I love to "get a break" and adult interaction for a few hours during the week. I also love spending most of my time with my girls. Sometimes the balance of being a mom is just... hard. But so fulfilling.
It's so weird :)

Anyway, I saw this poem/quote and it struck me, so I thought I'd share. Because at the end of the day, my baby girls (and husband) matter the most. Laundry/dishes/friends/tv/dinner can wait.
"Today I left some dishes dirty,
The bed got made around 3:30.
The diapers soaked a little longer,
The odor grew a little stronger.
The crumbs I spilled the day before
Are staring at me from the floor.
The fingerprints there on the wall
Will likely be there still next fall.
The dirty streaks on those windowpanes
Will still be there next time it rains.
Shame on you, you sit and say,
Just what did you do today?

I held a baby till she slept,
I held a toddler while she wept.
I played a game of hide and seek,
I squeezed a toy so it would squeak.
I pulled a wagon, sang a song,
Taught a child right from wrong.
What did I do this whole day through?
Not much that shows, I guess that's s true.
Unless you think that what I've done,
Might be important to someone
With deep blue eyes and soft brown hair,
If that is true... I've done my share."


Stephanie McCall said...

I love that poem! I'm going to save that- it's a good reminder!

Melissa at Tall Blonde Blog said...

We all struggle. I used to be a freak about my house, but over the past year and a half or so since Mia has been more active I've been "training" myself to spend more time with her than I do keeping my house tidy. There will always be stuff to do. I complain to my Hubs all the time that I feel like within 0.2 seconds of cleaning our house, especially the kitchen it's a disaster.
There will be plenty of time for the other things when they are in college and we have an empty house.

Love this poem. Thanks for sharing!

Hang in there!

Erin said...

Well, I can't sew and my house is definitely NEVER spotless or clutter free and I don't cook nearly enough... Oh, and I DONT have kiddos. So woman, you are ROCKING at your job!!! :) Your babies always looks SO HAPPY and that's whats important!!

Joeylee said...

Your not the only one. I stay home with my girls & my house is never fully clean, the girls eat junk when I can't get them to eat anything else, they argue & I lost my patience. Our beds never get made & we don't attend story time. So don't feel bad for anything your a great mom & your girls always seem happy!!